Monday, October 10, 2011

many thanks

total tablature

Clickety link for results. Meow.

Thursday, October 6, 2011

commence launch sequence

hi. k, coupla things. online reg is ending tonight at midnight. manual/paper reg will happen from 6-8 fri night at the campground area. dont forget the $5 or six pack late penalty. more prizes from our amazing sponsors are rolling in. four half barrells of pabst blue ribbon have been procured. weather is going to be worth a million bucks. any mountain biker worth their weight in salt will be there. blow off reality and come to the burnin.

just a reminder to anyone that is racing. saturday morning at seven am there is a mandatory riders meeting. you will get your tshirts(if applicable), timing chips, and number. in the following two hours you will place your bike in the start/finish area and line up for the lemans start. at nine am we will go for a little jog, mount our steeds, and ride into oblivion.

if, at any time you decide to finish racing, turn in your timing chip. no one will be dnf'ed that starts the race. there is no reason to wait in the woods at the end of the race so that your team mate wont have to go out. just turn in your chip when you are done and the magic of the master brain computer will do the work. the promoter will charge you $100 for that piece if'in you dont turn it in, so dont sleep on it.

when all the people make it in from their last laps of the day, and we tally the results, there will be an awards ceremony. if more than five people wear costumes we can have a costume contest. for the contest there will be a q+A, runway, and possibly a dance off.

no, really. it is a party and you are invited. free, delicious, pbr. awards, cash, heckling, and of course, belt buckles. big ones. that are sweet.

see ya there.

Monday, October 3, 2011

let's play catch up, grab a bev and get comfy...

howdy folks! just got back from the future, and let me tell you what! this weekend is going leave an indelible impression on most of you!

1.firstly, and possibly most importantly, we have the buckles. jim over at millstream metals has yet again graced us with his artwork. you must have one.

2.secondly, we have, once again, procured pabst blue ribbon as a title sponsor. they are so good to us! we are talking about delicious, cold pbr, tons of prizes, and cold hard cash. we love them long time.

we are also receiving prizes/schwag from Specialized, Clif Bar, Quality Bicycle Products(salsa, surly, etc), Mavic, Sram, and Gateway Harley Davidson.

Stika Bros Construction and Gateway Harley Davidson are putting up cash to sponsor laps, TBA. if anyone would like to sponsor a lap please contact me.

we have, once again, had Northwest Coffee do a Mesa Cycles roast of beans for the event, for prizes.

Specialized will be there with the demo truck for anyone that would like to try a 2012 bike on an amazing trail.

3-D, as many of you know, camp site were sold out some time ago. there will be overflow camping at the beach. if you have ever been to the area you know that this is an amazing opportunity to camp right on a beautiful lakefront. there are bathrooms and pay showers down there as well. anyone camping down there may bring their support tables and accoutrement up to the start/finish and set up.

4. quad laser = actually a big deal here... i will be down there fri afternoon and late reg will go from 6-8pm. there is a $5 fee for paper reg. there is no packet/t-shirt pickup fri night. don't ask, k?

THERE IS A MANDATORY RIDER MEETING FOR ALL PARTICIPANTS SATURDAY OCT 8, AT SEVEN AM. at this time you will receive your number(marker on leg, or forehead), your timing chip, and t-shirt. all racers get a chip and it will be your responsibility to turn it in when you are done racing, or be charged for it. ultramax timing will be on premise to keep track of everyone's shot at glory.

THE RACE WILL BEGIN AT NINE AM, OCT 8. all 6/12 hour soloist and one member from each team will place their bike on the ground in the starting area for a lemans start(see mashor for vid example). we will then go for a little jog around the park, mount up, and burn it up.

the event is based on AMTRI rules(use the google). everyone is on their honor to ride the class appropriate for them. i will place you in the event that you mistake your classification and it is brought to my attention.

the Gateway Off Road Cyclists are providing mountain bike patrollers to sweep the course. there will be an aid station, for emergency, at enough boat launch. there will be an EMT near the start/finish for those deciding to injure themselves. please don't.

and now, without further ado, here is the current competition...

jeffthiemefastwet dream
kylehusseyfastwet dream
stevesnyderfastwet dream
LarryKoester1x1One Gear = More Beer
BryanAdams1x1One Gear = More Beer
MikeBarro1x1One Gear = More Beer
LoranCavanofast220, 221 whatever it takes
AlexBischofffast220, 221 whatever it takes
AndrewBergerfast220, 221 whatever it takes
JasonZoll1x1Single Speed Jerk Off
DanBruns1x1Single Speed Jerk Off
EddieKlein1x1Single Speed Jerk Off
JonathonBorrsonfastSTIHL HORSEMEN
JasonWrightcoedSoBikin' Supafly's
CalebHulseycoedSoBikin' Supafly's
LauraScherffcoedSoBikin' Supafly's
ScottNelsonburninvirginsBlind Flying Nightingales
SeanBuechterburninvirginsBlind Flying Nightingales
JJSkiverburninvirginsBlind Flying Nightingales
JeffSmithcoedTwo Vets and a Virgin
BradBrowncoedTwo Vets and a Virgin
MissyPhegleycoedTwo Vets and a Virgin
TravisDonnwickedShake "n" Bake
GaretSteinmetzwickedShake "n" Bake
ChrisPlochwickedShake "n" Bake
RockWamsleywickedHoney Badgers
BrianBeyerwickedHoney Badgers
DaveSmithwickedHoney Badgers
StanleyCrockerfastpastTeam Mizzona
DougGangifastpastTeam Mizzona
GregLamprechtfastpastTeam Mizzona
ShawnMoorewickedTeam Tuff Taints
LeeMessersmithwickedTeam Tuff Taints
RandallStatlerwickedTeam Tuff Taints
WillScherffcoedBustin' Cheek
JoePerrycoedBustin' Cheek
CourtneyGreencoedBustin' Cheek
TobiasPalmerburninvirginsthe goad woofs
PhilLintzenichburninvirginsthe goad woofs
MattJohnsonburninvirginsthe goad woofs
ADAMRYBARcoedCzech out the Chick
LoreenMattsoncoedCzech out the Chick
ZdenekPalecekcoedCzech out the Chick
RichardPiercefastpastAncient Angels of Destruction
KentJonesfastpastAncient Angels of Destruction
JamesMoorefastpastAncient Angels of Destruction
GaryFentonfastpastMidwest Off Road Cyclists, Inc (MORC)
MarkGullettfastpastMidwest Off Road Cyclists, Inc (MORC)
JohnBradleyfastpastMidwest Off Road Cyclists, Inc (MORC)
JPSlosarfastMr Rister's Flesh-colored Crayon
AndrewMoormanfastMr Rister's Flesh-colored Crayon
SeanSowellfastMr Rister's Flesh-colored Crayon
LisaWhitewomenDirty Divas
JackieDozierwomenDirty Divas
JeanMatthewswomenDirty Divas
TedSalavaburninvirgins40 year old virgins
ToddBlumoffburninvirgins40 year old virgins
WalterDavisburninvirgins40 year old virgins
JohnLakefastpast26 Mafia
AlEbertfastpast26 Mafia
TomMarshfastpast26 Mafia
SteveRyanburninvirginsBig Boys on the Bus
SteveRyanburninvirginsBig Boys on the Bus
JohnConnersburninvirginsBig Boys on the Bus
DavidHagen1x1Burning out The Bluffholes
ChristianChellis1x1Burning out The Bluffholes
SteveFreidman1x1Burning out The Bluffholes
darrengilmore1x1Riders Against Derailleurs
bradbennett1x1Riders Against Derailleurs
ryanmeschke1x1Riders Against Derailleurs
MaxHoltzburninvirginsLanterne Rouge Racing
RobMaltbyburninvirginsLanterne Rouge Racing
JasonTorbitzkyburninvirginsLanterne Rouge Racing
MikeBestwickedLow Test Icicles
NateMeanswickedLow Test Icicles
JohnLeBlancwickedLow Test Icicles
BobArnoldfastpastOuthouse Ninjas
JohnMatthewsfastpastOuthouse Ninjas
TomAlbertfastpastOuthouse Ninjas
LeeVan NormanfastRadioDread

as always, feel free to contact me at 

Monday, September 12, 2011

we be jammin

howdy folks! just a note for the burners. all the campsites are sold out for the race. there will be overflow camping on the grassy hill area adjacent to the beach. stacy from bear paw said that everyone was so pumped when they called for reservations that she is getting really excited about the weekend. she mentioned to remind everyone of a couple things. there is no prepayment for the camping. she will be going around fri night, and sat, to collect fees for camping and day use. you will be getting passess to display in your cars to show that you have paid.  Single site capacity is 8 people and 2 vehicles, Double is 16 people and 4 vehicles and Group is 25 people and 8 vehicles. Extra cars are $4 each. bring extra cash for firewood and quarters for the shower house down at the beach. the registration is filling up slowly and it already looks like some categories will have battles of byzantine proportion. finally, if anyone needs anything regarding this, or just bad advice, in general, please call me(john) at the shop every weekday-314-645-4447, or email at

p.s.-now is the time to begin growing epic facial hair for the big mustache-off.